Welcome to Octopia, the site that aims to provide you with amusing information, art, anecdotes, and general flotsam and jetsam related to cephalopods of the order Octopoda.
(Yes, that’s me on the right with the leopard-print ‘puss.)
This site is dedoctated to the Weird Crowd and to Wilberforce Percival Mummy the III, the progenitor rubber octopus, and his many offspring.
If you have questions, direct them to me, the Mistress of the Tentacled Oblivion. Please keep this in mind: You do not want to ask the Mistress of the Tentacled Oblivion to help you with your homework, because tentacles are so unpleasant as they make their way up your nasal passage and out your nose.
This site has been updated from a pre-blog version. In the spirit of inky nostalgia, I’m including a link to a hilarious archive of the earliest responses I received from netizens entrapped by Octopia in its primal incarnation: Guestbook from the Old Days.
And also for posterity’s sake, the FIRST EVER Octopia post, from my friend Monsieur Antonio “Gesundheit” Linguistica:
“After a little bit of searching (but don’t worry, I didn’t stay up all night working on this), I’ve found some glosses for ‘octopus’. Hope you find these helpful:
French = either pieuvre or poulpe
Spanish = pulpo
German = Tintenfisch
Czech = chobotnice (pronounced KHO-boat-neats-eh)
Slovene = hobotnica
Classical Greek = polypous (paw-LOOP-oos)
Japanese = tako; yudedako (boiled octopus, yum!)
Finnish = meritursas, tursas; mustekala (also means ‘cuttlefish’, ‘squid!’)
Hungarian = polip
Swahili = pweza mkubwa
I should mention that I found the Greek entry through the Perseus project home page, which I still think is totally ‘the stuff’. Just as an aside, I also remember from that page that the Greek word for ‘asshole’; is euryproktos, a combination of two words that mean ‘wide anus’;. Just for your infoemayshawn.”
And thus was the site launched.
Please note: This page may contain artistic nudity.
I hope you enjoy, and feel free to email me with links, images, comments, questions, or requests for absolution.